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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  September 17, 2012 11:00pm-11:30pm PDT

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uise on my heel. - that's not bad. - no! it's not really bad at all. it's pretty fun-- it's like, "aah!" why don't you guys climb down that ladder? all right. later, bitches. later, bitches?! so they're just leaving? wait... why are they leaving? where are the cops? ryan (laughing): revenge! we got you, suckers! nobody messes with mcpoyles! whoo! whoo-hoo-hoo! whoo! whoo! mcpoyles! (bleep)-damn it! captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to the daily show. my name is is jon stewart. we're back home, baby.
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back from the conventions. very excitedded tonight. on our program kofi annan will be joining us on the program. former secretary-general of the united nations. what an eventful week. remember the internet, the magical force that showered democracy on the middle east >> when you look at the arab spring, how were people able to amass in various places? twitter >> it's impossible to overstate the role the internet has played. the arab spring wouldn't have happened without twitter and without social media >> jon: true. it's true. of course here we use it to blog the x-factor. millions of people it's an exciting time for twitter. hey, what else is on the internet? let me see. that's not arab spring. democracy, no freedom. yeah, that's... i don't know what that is. what's this? >> an incredibly amateurish, crude and nasty movie made in the united states and released on you-tube, "innocence of
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muslims" it's called. it depicts the prophet mohammed as a dope, a fraud, a pedophile and womanizer >> jon: it's you-tube. i mean nobody pays attention to you-tube. why not have some fun with it. that will be the last we hear of it. what's that now in >> u.s. embassies and continuesate las under siege in middle east. africa and even asia. this map shows the unrest spreading to more than a dozen nations. >> jon: i see. that brings us to tonight's segment, actual democalypse. all this destruction and bloodshed was over a dumb internet video made by some [bleep]. and promoted by... ( applause ) ... and it was promoted by the koran-burning florida pastor terry jones. i believe we have a clip of him as well. >> a very naughty boy.
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now go away. >> who are you? i'm his mother, that's who jon: i'm being told that is a very different terry jones mocking a different world religion in a film that has been round for 3 years. well, that must be a lot of burned embassies... really? none at all. fair enough. look, i'm all about cultural sensitivity. the whole point of my 1996 rab album. but i have to say, i don't understand this one. an online film that nobody has seen made by some [bleep] is a pretext for violence. some of the leaders are deliberately exploiting whatever they can get their hands on to rile up the populous for their own political gain. hey, wait a minute. you really are getting the hang of this democracy thing pretty fast. by the way, no one over there was freaking out when egyptian state television aired a movie based on the protocols of the elders of zion which has won the
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oscar for most insulting film ever since movies were invented. the whole "jews rule the world and kill christian babies." it's a tad offensive. did the jews get revenge by burning embassies. no we got our revenge in the old-fashioned way, a bad review in the times and a rather wry cartoon poking fun of a film in the new yorker with a cat as a film critic who doesn't want... it's very wry. the point is you want to be a mature country you need a better way to express your viewing displeasure. the rating system. i give it two thumbs off. you have to find symbolism. for more on this i'm joined by john oliver live in cairo. john, how is everything going? what's happening?
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>> what's happening. jon, it's beautiful here, jon. friendly people. rich history. delicious food. i'm having a fantastic time >> jon: really? that's great >> not really, jon. of course not. have you been near a [bleep] television recently? things are pretty bad around here. look, i think it's important for us all to pause and note that it is clearly not the majority of muslims who are protesting in the streets. it's not even the majority of protestors who are getting violent. to put this in context, we should really remember islam's young age. >> jon: it's 1400 years old exactly, jon. in religious years islam is still just a teenager. put it in context. think what christianity was doing when it was only 1400 years old. >> jon: no, that's not... ( cheers and applause )
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>> jon: yeah, i guess that is. .. >> exactly. bloody crusades, the inquisition, execution of hair ticks. christianity is just lucky there weren't cell phones around then to film that [bleep]. >> jon: you know what? i mean, if you think about it, when judaism was still a teenager >> judaism, are you kidding me. on: yeah you people couldn't keep your teenage shofars in your tunics. begetting in canaan >> jon: begetting in babylon. we were begetting so much we couldn't even stand on a mountain without having to hold a tablet in front of our... you know what i mean? >> you people nearly begat yourselves blind. the point is is, jon, there is good news. that is that religions grow out of this awkward phase. again look at christianity. we've aged into young adulthood. now we can all laugh about the time we used to burn young girls at the stake for being
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left-handed. or as we called it back then, witch craft. >> jon: yeah, i don't think that's so funny. >> jon, that's because your religion is... in fact, how old are you? >> jon: we're 5773 today. obviously you don't look a day over 5729. that's a fact. >> jon: we've been jogging. you're glowing. it's working. the point, jon, is that we need to be patient with islam. they do not have it easy. remember, most teenagers have some means of escape from their insecurity. they smoke pot. they experiment with sex. all night bacon parties. reformation. muslims can't do any of that stuff right now. >> jon: you're saying if we just wait 300 to 400 years >> half a millennium at most. jon: then there will be peace peace? what? [bleep] no, jon. but if we're lucky, we will
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finally stop fighting over real or imagined insults to our religions and go back to fighting over what really matters: natural resources and arbitrary lines on maps. ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: john o o
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>> jon: welcome back to the show. as we've seen seeing, a lot of unrest and anger in the middle east this past week. the condemnation of obama has been swift and furious >> this leading from behind obama doctrine is up in flames >> terrorists believe they can attack our embassy with impunity, they believe the killr ambassador and there will be no response >> how much longer can we afford to spill our blood and treasure trying to, quote unquote, promote democracy in places that do not have any values for civilized society. >> jon: yes. democracy promotion is wrong. that's a somewhat isolationist position, ex-governor palin. does anyone see our role in the world differently? yes, you 2008 still governor palin >> i see our role in the world as one of being a force for
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good, to help these rising smaller democratic countries that are just, you know, they're putting themselves on the map right now >> jon: what a bold freedom agenda. it's a little bit naive. i mean, think of the blow-back >> egyptians elected a muslim brotheredhood member to head their country. let's not forget. this is very first place in the middle east that president obama promised to bring, quote democracy too >> jon: you believe through the prism of history people will look back at obama and this shift of freedom, efforty and democracy in the middle east and he'll be viewed as myopic >> through the prism of history we'll look back at george w. bush and see this shift toward freedom, liberty and democracy in the middle east and elsewhere in the world and he will be viewed as a great visionary >> jon: full throated defense of the value of democracy >> the meade cora and our government, democracy. this is a good thing. and i'm sitting here saying, all
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right. what is going to take over? it was obviously the muslim brotherhood was the only group that had any political clout. >> jon: young not as fat you. all right. i guess you can't just let people depots their own dictators in the name of democracy. >> we have at least some hope for peace in the middle east and democracy. certainly better than what they have. >> jon: i got to tell you something. i love it when that conservative patriot guy pulls on that naive leftist deutch bag. what's the name of that show in hannity and takes the opposite position the younger hannity. it's a great show. that's great television. now listen to me, we could go all night. we could go all night bringing up examples of pundits on the right who couldn't do enough to
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promote democracy in the middle east as long as it was done at the end of george bush's jaunt. as middle eastern countries choose leaders for themselves lordy lordy, it's not enough. why don't we talk through an actual middle east policy >> americans today are seeing a mess on their television screens. there's unleaving throughout the middle east. >> got a real mess on our hands. in part because of the policies of president obama over the last several years in the region >> jon: that's foreign policy advisor to mitt romney and mr. ryan dan senor, decrying the middle east messiness. why don't you rebut him, chief spokesman for the coalition provisional authority in iraq, a more junior dan senor >> democracy we often said when we were there that democracy is messy. if you want clean and tidy there's dictatorship but right now these iraqis political leaders are immersed in their first sort of democratic experiment >> jon: i get you, man.
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it was the early to mid, man. everybody was experimenting with democracy then. what's up? you know what [bleep] i'm out of here. just go at it, you two. >> just a reminder of the chaos that a lot of the policies of this administration have sowed. chaos in the arab spring. chaos for allies in israel. there are certainly areas that are problematic. we are having some tough days. we'll have tough days ahead. what we've seen in the last three days is a product of policies that have been building over the last three years. if we are successful in building some modicum democracy, it will be an enormous success. you think the president's policy in the middle east has been a success. looks like a disaster to most americans. there has been significance violence in recent weeks. certainly today's tragic death of over 30 people but it also correlates with progress on the political track. disaster. progress. chaos. disaster. progress. ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: wow. one man's chaos is another man's
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progress. here's the thing that i really find the most troubling. how can one man's opinion shift so drastically and yet his hairline stays exactly the same? i can't tell if these guys are cynical, clueless or in denial. we will be right
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( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight, he was the 7th secretary-general of the united nations. most recently the u.n. and arab league envoy to syria. his new book is called interventions, a life in war and peace. please welcome to the program kofi annan. ( cheers and applause ) >> thank you, sir. nice to see you. >> jon: how are you? thanks for joining us. the book is called interventions. let me ask you this. how's the world? >> messy. jon: it is messy. it is messy. jon: you have been following these events for a very long time. would you say in your estimation on the kofi annan scale of peace
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in our time to "oh, my god, run! "where would you say the world is right now? >> you're close to run. jon: really? more than in previous times, even the bosnian conflict, people were involved in >> today we have syria's problem in the middle east and the whole region. if syria has a miscalculation can really create a problem, we will not be able to handle. syria is divided. we know civil war is going on. the region is divided. and the security council, that supposed to be responsible for international peace is also divided. this make it very difficult to try and bring a solution. that's why i've been encouraging unity of the council, for them to make an effort and really
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work in a very volatile region of the world >> jon: let me ask you this. the security council, two questions. who is to blame? i want names. (laughing) two, even if they were unified, what would they do? what could they do? could they do anything other than issue a proclamation to syria to say, come on. >> i think there is quite a bit they can do. if they were to come together and begin to put pressure on the government in the region to work with them, to pressure both sides and put a proposal on the table that there has to be a political transition, political settlement and really give them an idea of what that would entail. we tried to do that in geneva on the 30th of june when we held a meeting where the foreign ministers of the permanent members of the u.n. were there.
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secretary clinton was there. russia, all of them were there. we agreed on principles and guidelines for political settlement which i had expected them to come to new york and endorse. it hasn't been endorsed up to today >> jon: why is russia reluctant to endorse? >> i think actually on this one the problem was not on the russian side >> jon: let's just blame them. (laughing) jon: obviously the show is on american television. i'm sure when you visit the russian tv show, you can lay it at our feet. >> we complain that the russians and the chinese have vetoed and blocked us from taking action >> jon: that's right but i still don't know what specific effective action we are going to take on the ground that the russians and the chinese blocked. if today they were to say, okay, we have no objections, what are we going to do? and this is the question >> jon: okay. because if you're asking me, we
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have a terrible problem here. but have world events gotten outside of the control of the leading powers or do we have a mistaken nostalgic view of what countries were really able to do and influence even in the past? how did these always... haven't these always arisen? >> i think you've always had that problem but during the cold war the cold war, the true powers could influence countries. there was some control. at the collapse of the soviet union, the council became a bit more harmonious and they could take positions. so the u.n. and the peace-keeping forces began being intre deuced into civil war situations >> jon: in some ways the democratization of the region, the rise of democracy, the
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collapse of the soviet union, has created much of this unrest. we are going to have to perhaps live with the volatility until the next world war. >> and when is that going to be jon: believe me, i've got things in mind. will you stick around so we can talk a little bit more about the book and your rise to the top of the u.n. and all that? if you would. i'd appreciate that very much. we'll be right back. "intervention: a life in war and peace" is on the book shelves now. we'll have more with kofi annan on the
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that's our show. before we go, i just want to mention something real quick. as you know on this program we have at times poked a bit of fun at... ummm... fox news.
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well, that being the case, i have been challenged to a debate by one of their pundit-news hybrid man >> big announcement about me and jon stewart. in order to illuminate the vital issues associated with the upcoming presidential election. stewart and i will debate, man to man, eye to eye... well, not really. ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: i'm so scared. bill o'reilly wants to tango, so i say this. i accept, mr. o'reilly. i shall meet you in the square. for an old-fashioned dual of witts. obviously he and i... there had be some discussion and compromises made. he has demanded that we speak at podiums. i have


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